Tuesday, October 24, 2006

A good nights sleep


     I finally slept good last night.  What a difference a good nights sleep makes on everything.  My pain is better, I am even thinking of going out and trying for some new pictures of the blowing leaves.  I also want to go to the antique store and bring a couple of items I picked up.  I got the sweetest vintage silver perfume pendant.  The top unscrews and there is a dabber for appling the scent.  I hope it sells for Christmas as it is really sweet and fairly old.  20's I think.


    I also picked up a 1926 football pendant.  It is silver also with a chain.  Hopefully it will appeal to someone.  I really like the chain on it.


   Today I will try and get by with tylenol.  It will be nice to have my mind unfoggy.   That makes doing everything you do seem like you are underwater and in slow motion.

    What would make someone want to live their lives that way?  Drugged up all the time, everything a struggle.  Dulled senses where even something funny is dimmed.  Guess that I why I never had a problem with drugs or drink. 

    When I get angry I want to spit blood and scream and holler and really let go.  When I am happy I want to whoop and laugh from my gut.  When I am sad I want to really get into my sorrow and get it out of my system instead of slowly releasing it.  Life is too short and I want to feel every emotion while I can.  Sad for those who can't.  Not that I have anything against someone who needs meds for depression.  That is for when you can't get overit naturally and need help.  I am lucky that I can never stay depressed for long.  Something joyful always distracts me.

   Well, I finally got the courage to step on the scale today.  The damage isn't quite as bad as I had feared.  I am up 3 pounds.  Since we have been eating quite abit of fattening food like chili, goulash,  hamburgers it is not surprising.  I am even feeling good enough to start thinking about hitting the gym shortly.  Just the treadmill.  So things are really getting better.  Yippy.

   If you haven't read Linda's entry today in http://journals.aol.com/linnpooh/LindasThotfulSpot/ you should check it out.  Very good entry today. 

   A while back my sister said something that really hurt me.  After I thought about it though I realized that my sister doesn't know me.  She hasn't spoken to me for years and we are not close.  So it wasn't me that she was talking about.  She doesn't know me.  So anyway check out that entry, very good.  And thats all the rambling for now folks.  Oh, here is one for all the mothers out there.  Very sweet also.When You Thought I Wasn't Looking





lanurseprn said...

I'm so glad you are feeling better!!!  YAY!!  

nelishianatl said...

I am so glad you are well enough to get out there and use a leaf blower.  I don't understand the need to dim all your senses through alcohol or drugs either.  I'm passionate about everything I do and couldn't ever be happy flatlining emotionally.  As i put it, making myself crazy on purpose.  I hope you have a very good week!

madcobug said...

Glad you are feeling better. Go ahead and get some pictures to share with us. I never liked the feeling of what drugs do to me either. I had much rather have my right senses but sometimes the pain gets to a person and that is when they need something. I could never understand why a person wanted drugs just to feel out of it. Helen

candlejmr said...

I'm so glad you are feeling better and coming out of your drug induced "fog" (lol)  That mother poem had me CRYING....but then again, it doesn't take much to get me crying lately!  It's REALLY nice though!


jckfrstross said...

glad you are feeling better:) have a good week


linnpooh said...

I'm so glad you were finally able to get some sleep Julie! Also glad that your pain seems to be less today and you are feeling up to getting out a little....YEAH!! I would love to visit your shop as I'm a jewelry hound, and I love antique dishes.......at Christmas time you should post pictures of it :)

I hope tomorrow is even better than today was for you....

Pooh Hugs,