This is for all my Southern Friends.

  I got this in an email and thought it was a hoot.  So here it is.

 

 

                              Southern Talk

Someone once noted that a Southerner can get away with the most awful kind of insult just as long as it's prefaced with the words, "Bless her heart" or "Bless his heart." As in, "Bless his heart, if they put his brain on the head of a pin, it'd roll around like a BB on a 6-lane highway."

I was thinking about this the other day when a friend was telling about her new transplanted northern friend who was upset because her toddler is just beginning to talk and he has a Southern accent. My friend, who is very kind and, bless her heart, cannot do a thing about those thighs of hers, was justifiably miffed about this. After all, this woman had CHOSEN to move to South a couple of years ago.  "Can you believe it?" said her friend, "A child of mine is going to be "taaaallllkkin liiiike thiiiissss."

Now, don't get me wrong. Some of my dearest friends are from the North, bless their hearts. I welcome their perspective, their friendships, and their recipes for authentic Northern Italian food. I've even gotten past their endless complaints that you can't find good bread down here.  And the heathens, bless their hearts, don't like cornbread!

I have a friend from Bawston, bless her heart, who thinks it's hilarious when I say I've got to "carry" my daughter to the doctor or "cut off" the light. She also gets a giggle every time I am "fixin" to do something. And, bless their hearts, they don't even know where "over yonder" is, or what "I reckon" means!

My personal favorite was my aunt, saying, "Bless her heart, she cain't help being ugly, but she could'uh stayed home."

Southern girls know bad manners when they see them:
1. Drinking straight out of a can.
2. Not sending thank you notes.
3. Velvet after February.
4. White shoes before Memorial Day or after Labor Day.

Southern girls always say:
1. "Yes Maam."
2. "Yessir."

Southern girls have a distinct way with fond expressions:
1. "Yawl come back."
2. "Well, bless yer harrt."
3. "Drop by when ya can."
4. "How's yer mama?"
5. "Love yer hair."

Southern girls know their three R's:
1. Rich
2. Richer
3. Richest (Can I get an Amen?!)

Southern girls know everybody's first name:
1. Hunny
2. Darlin'
3. Schuga

Southern girls know the movies that speak to their hearts:
1. "Gone With the Wind"
2. " Fried Green Tomatoes"
3. "Driving Miss Daisy"
4. "Steel Magnolias"

Southern girls know the three deadly sins:
1. Bad hair
2. Bad manners
3. Bad blind dates

G.R.I.T.S. = Girls Raised in The South !

Now you run along, Shuger, and send this to ANY females aspiring to be GRITS--Even the northern ones, "Bless Their Hearts".