Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Good Morning


        Good Morning J-land.  Hope the world finds you all hale and well.

         Its a cool crisp day in Iowa.  Most of the leaves are off the trees and the air has that spicy dead leaves smell which I love.  My morning walk in the woods with Zoey is so nice.  Today she isn't feeling the best.  I am afraid her pancreatitis is becoming chronic.   We both slept until 10:15 am, wow and then I found out she had gotten sick in the night.  Fortunately not on the carpet.  I gave her some popcorn last night and it must have been too much for her.  No more people snacks.

      We didn't go out last night.  My MIL decided she didn't want the LPN coming after she had had company all weekend.  We had it planned for her to come after my MIL usually goes to bed and I don't know why us watching her sleep would be any different then the LPN, but anyway we canceled.  

    It is important as caregivers to get some time for yourself.  You will build up some resentment no matter how much you love the person at the disruption of your life.  Especially if it goes on for a long time.  Then you feel guilty because you feel this resentment because for it to end means your family member is no longer alive.  I know this because I worked 10 years in Oncology.  Its a normal feeling.  That is why I know it important to have these days off.  So I have to have a talk with my MIL and see what was behind her refusal.  Did she feel especially sick last night?  Or as can be with myMIL was it just her being ornery because she can be that at times also.  I know the relatives spent a lot of time discussing my BIL & swapping horror stories in the kitchen and even with her poor hearing maybe she heard and is mad at us all.  I spent a lot of time this weekend shushing everyone.  Sigh.  Whatever the reason I was disappointed but we will try again for Friday.

    I watched a movie here with Zoey and had popcorn.  Since we are down to one car I couldn't go over there and I just stayed here and relaxed.  We watched The White Countess.  It was pretty good.  I didn't go to bed until 2 am so I am very happy I slept in.  Now I am doing my laundry and cleaning house.  Then I will go to my MIL's and work today.  2 more nights of work.  It goes fast.  Soon my long week off.  Soon.

    Take care all.



coelha said...

May be your MIL just wants some alone time.  She may be feeling depressed.  I'm guessing she wouldn't mind if you called her though.  Take care - Julie

madcobug said...

I am sorry that you two missed dinner out. Might have been your MIL just felt more secure with you two being there since she had so much company lately. She could have heard some of the remarks about her son and was depressed. I hope you can have that time together later. I also hope Zoey feels better soon. Helen

jimsulliv3 said...

I like the flower pics. Hope Zoey feels better ! I was a combat medic in the army and for a while we served at a VA Hospital in Miami. Most of the patients were older and time usually takes its toll. I aways left there depressed because there was not enough of an age mixture to reflect life in general. When we transferred to Homestead Air Force base, it was a lot easier, mentally.


rbrown6172 said...

so sorry you didn't get your time off...you are so right about caregivers taking care of themselves.  hopefully, you will be able to get away for a while friday.  take care!

lanurseprn said...

I never realized how hard it is to be a caregiver until I did it myself for my own Mom. The way you describe it is exactly on target!
Have a good day.

rdautumnsage said...

I hope your able to talk to your MIL and explain you love her, but need time to be a couple. Keeping her and Zoey in my prayers on the smoke. (Hugs) Indigo

radar446 said...

"It is important as caregivers to get some time for yourself.  You will build up some resentment no matter how much you love the person at the disruption of your life.  Especially if it goes on for a long time."  You are so undeniably correct here.  It is something that I have been learning for a few years now.  In the beginning I felt like I was so selfish for wanting to do things for me, but as the time goes on, I realize that I am much more effective of a caregiver when my needs are being met.


jlocorriere05 said...

You're so right that you need to take time out for yourself. Looking after someone can be overwhelming, especially if the person is a relative ~ the patient seems to expect more from you. Make sure you rest and have a break when you feel you need one. I hope Zoey feels better now. Jeannette xx  

jckfrstross said...

hope you get time off:)


mail4campbell said...

Loved the pic! Sounds like you really have a good understanding of the whole caregiver thing...hope you remember to keep taking care of YOU.  I had some popcorn last night as well...I love it, but my teeth hate it! So sorry Zoey wasn't feeling so good, hope she is going to be well. Thanks for sharing! Love2U

kirkbyj05 said...

I love your flower photos Julie!
As for Betty stopping your night out together...I reckon you need to have words with her for the next time.  I know her illness is terminal but you should not be made to feel guilty for wanting some time together alone with your husband.  I would have persevered and gone out regardless.
She would have been well looked after so there was nothing to worry about. As for her darling son, your BIL, why shouldn't she find out what he is like?  Her not wanting to hear is another way of controlling the situation.
Roll on the next couple of nights and then you can relax a bit.  Sorry Zoey is feeling rough...bless her!  Hope she gets over it soon.
Take care,
Jeanie  xx

springangel235 said...

I do hope Zoey will be okay...I have a dog that if he eats any table food at all, he throws up.  Always have your MIL in prayer...you take care...many hugs and love,