Finally some answers

                                       

   I am off my restrictions.  I got good, news bad news at the docs.  Good news, no tears, bad news is I am going to hurt for awhile and maybe off and on forever.   The MRI showed, (Marrow edema at the posteior aspect of the patella with small subchondral cysts and thinning of the patella cartlage indicates chondromalacia and mild patellar degeneration). 

    Meaning I did have the patella-femoral syndrome and it may become chronic.  Usually due to arthritis, big surprise.  So he says to keep doing the exercises, take the motrin, ( just wondering..... has anyone ever had motrin help for pain?) and try not to get it flared up again.  Which means I have to suck it up and deal with the pain off and on when it happens until it finally heals or becomes chronic.  Figures it wouldn't be something they could easily fix.

   Good news is I can go back to work at my regular hours and my regular pay.  And I don't have to work today.  And if they let me work the entire shift I will get some overtime for this week which I sure could use.  I have heard it say that getting old isn't for wimps, and that sure is true.

   WARNING, WARNING,WARNING.

           RANT AHEAD!

 

I finally heard today why they keep going on and on about this global warming frenzy. The real reason came out. They want to tax us on it. I was skeptical before, now I am sure it is pure bunk. Now this is my opinion, my journal so I can believe and write what I want and you don't have to believe it.

I think it is a naturally occurring thing. Plenty of scientists agree with me. But some people are making good money off this. It gives the media and doom and gloom people something to talk about. As if we need something as vague as this with the real threat in the middle east? That that is really scary!

I have heard there are 3 E's that the government uses every time they want to increase taxes and not have people in an uproar over. Education, Elderly, and Environment. What kind of people would we be to deny our children the best education, our elderly health care or housing, our planet a fighting chance. Why monsters! So we dig deep, we dig gladly, we give and we give and we give. But you know what? Our schools still are having big problems, we are falling behind in our education system, our elderly still can't afford food or medication and people still throw their trash out of the car window. We should be putting all that money into biodegradable supplies, but that is another rant. If we could just teach people how not to litter I would pay that tax and it makes so much more sense the global warming being our fault.

So why do we keep falling for this. The people who are predicting our doom have it safely far enough in the future it won't be proved right or wrong in out generation and they can make their entire career on this. Some other new tax raising scheme will come along and global warming will go to the way side just as the predictions of the coming ice age did. In the meantime like good little lemmings we with warm generous hearts give and give and give. AAARRRRGGGGHHHH

 

 

Early Doc appointment

                     

     So they finally called around 4 and told me to come in to see the doc at 8 am.  She read the report to me, but nurse or no nurse I wasn't sure what it meant.   Edema I understood, no fracture, good....decreased cartilage?   Is it just arthritis.  So I ask, should I where my uniform because I will have to go to work if he doesn't lift my restriction tomorrow.  Yes, wear your uniform.  So he isn't releasing me yet?  I don't know.   Crap.

   So I go to bed early.  Be at the docs at 8 am.  Wearing my uniform because if he doesn't release me I have to do my light duty job for 10 hours.  Why couldn't I just talk to the doc so I know for sure.  Man.  I hate not knowing but I will tomorrow.  Time to meditate and go to bed.

What is my journal worth?

                  

My blog is worth $12,419.88.
How much is your blog worth?

 

   Well not a heck of a lot but this is a cool site I got from Guido's site.  How much is your site worth?

Zoey's Birthday

                               

     Zoey, aka, the Tongue, turned 8 yesterday.  At least that is what we call her birthday since she was adopted from the humane society.  No party but she did get a wonderful romp in the snow and a large Greenie.   Many more Zoey.

    Sitting here this morning and my boss called me.  Wanted to tell me the work comp nurse wanted to know why I hadn't been at my volunteer desk this week, WHAT?  Now why would they expect me to be there.  No one had mentioned,  I already have 40 hours in and am suppose to work 40 more this weekend if the doc releases me.  No calls, nothing.  I was ticked.  I called her up to find out what was going on and she told me I was suppose to show up everyday until I got my release.  What about if I get released I asked?  Then they wouldn't let me work this weekend and I make a heck of lot more working my nights on a weekend then I do days.  I told her I would call the doc and see if he could tell me what my MRI shows.  It is is the patellofemerol syndrome he is going to release me to work so I will work my weekend and if it isn't that I will work the rest of the week starting tomorrow at my wonderful light duty job.  But if it is tear they had better get me scheduled for a repair pronto.  Can we say what we have here is a failure to communicate!  My fault also as I should have made sure what was expected of me.  Sigh.  So now I am waiting for them to call back.

    I got so much housework done yesterday.  If I didn't leave it until the last day I all the time it wouldn't be so bad but I hate housework.  Today I was looking at my couch pillows in disgust.  Whether it ruined them or not I decided to throw them in the washer on a soak cycle and then gentle wash and see what happened.  If it ruined them I would get some more, if not I would have nice clean ones again I wasn't ashamed to have on the couch.  What made me decide to get light one is the first place?  Anyway they turned out wonderful, like new.  Yippy.  I really do like them as they are a leaf theme which I have all over my house.  Back to nature sort of thing along with all my earthy pottery.

   We went out for our Monday date last night and a young couple came in.  I could tell it was a date.  The girl took at least 3 calls on her cell and one lasted around 10 minutes.  If I was the guy I would have gotten up and left.   How rude was that.  No one seems to have any manners anymore.  If she wanted to touch base with her girlfriends on how the date was going that is what a powder room is for.  Lord knows I have had to work my way past many a young lady on the phone in the can. 

   More snow predicted for tonight.  This is getting really old.  I am counting the days until spring.

                  

 

Blond pole dancer

 

 

Beautiful Blonde Pole Dancer

If you should find it too offensive,
please advise, and I will remove your name
promptly from these type of emails!

 

(Open Discreetly)


Please scroll on Down.......

 

Mom's Medicine

   I read this the other day and it is so good.  Anyone my age will relate.

  You seen the commercials- the caring mother tucks her ailing child in bed, kisses him on the forehead and wishes him sweet dreams.

The soothing announcer calls her "Dr. Mom."

Nice but, really, how true is it?

When I was growing up, we went to school no matter how intense the cholera.  As long as our body parts stayed, more or less, in the places where they grew, we were fine.

"Fresh air will do you good, " mom said.  So, while the icicles formed from my nose, I trudged to school, hoping we'd have chicken noodle soup, not phlegmy tater tot casserole.

f I got home and complained of an ear ache, she'd say, " Come here," and blow smoke in my ear.

If I had an upset stomach, she'd pour a glass of 7-up- the magic gastrointestinal elixi.

Fever? Get a washcloth, run in under cold waster and pu in on your head/

Runny nose, sore throat?  Put Vicks Vapo-Rub on your chest and wrap a sock around your neck.

Hiccups?  She'd find a paper bag, blow it up and pop it in my presence.  If that ddn't work, she'd yell, "Boo!"

Measles? "Go to bed and turn out the the light. Don't itch."

Headache? "Stay away from the ice cream.  That;s what;s causing it."

Name a problem, she had a solution.

She didn't need carseats either.

If we rode in the front seat and she had to make a sudden stop her right arm would instinctively spring out, keeping us from shooting through the windshield.  If the weather was particularly bad, we'd have to huddle on the floor neat the "hump."

Because soft drinks came in bottles in those days, we were always told we'd chip a tooth f we drank on in the car while t was moving. So we were pretty about the following the rules.  When cans began to replace them (because they were disposable-get that), we ran the risk of cutting our lips.  It happened quite often because the pull tabs lifted off.  Blood on the can?  Entirely possible.

Second-hand smoke was never a considerations either. We didn't just have ashtrays in my hourse.  We had hadwls- the size of pig trough.  The school encouraged smoking too.  For Christmas presents we'd make ashtrays for our parents.  One year, we even took a mold of mom left hand so she could get a personalized ashtrya, one that fit snugly in her non-butt hand.

Vaccinations were also a universal thing.  They weren't left to nursed in the Doctors office.  They were part of the normal school day.  Several times a year, teachers lined us up to get a shot for something. ( Swine flu was a big concern when I was young and since nobody wanted to oink, we dutifully stood in neat little rows.)  Sugar cubes filled with medicine were also huge.  Whenever they wanted to appeal to a wad of kids, they put something bad in a sugar cube and we were game.

Obesity wasn't much of a problem, though, because soda machines were hidden in the teacher's lounge.  If you wanted to get a can of pop, you had to run the gauntlet-and withstand the mushroom cloud of smoke.

We also had physical education classes that were mandatory.  If you didn't want to drop and give me 20, you ran the risk of failing.

Sometimes the medical advice we got wasn't good. ) Walk it off" isn't a panacea and butter doesn't help burns), but it saw us through a number of crises and gave us a sense of security.

It you want the truth behind all the "Dr. Mom" stuff, take a closer look at the commercial.  It isn't what she's feeding the child that counts.  It's the attention she's giving him.

Hugs and compassion.

Isn't it nice to know the best medicine doesn't always come in bottles?

  This was written by Bruce Miller.

           

Monday and all dug out

                                          

   Well we finally got dug out.  We have around 8 inches in places and no sooner do we get our driveway dug out the plow comes buries us in again.  Some idiot in a 4 wheel drive just insisted on going on our road before it was plowed.  Now remember we had rain before the snow and it is warm so not only did he leave huge ruts he got stuck in my ditch, road on my yard and took out one of my expensive shrubs.  Wish I had seen the idiot.

   Well I was a good girl and did do all I said I was going to do yesterday.  Got lots of pictures taken and some items listed.  It takes so long but once they are all listed I can relax.  Then I went to bed last night and the furnace was really making a racket.  We are still trying to squeak by with the old fan but I think we are losing.  I turned the heat down to 63 so it wouldn't run as much.  We are so used now to having the temp at around 66 that anything higher seems too hot.

    My knee feels so much better today.  Sitting on the broken chair must have been what got it so acute again.  Yah.  The throbbing pain was really getting to me.  I can put up with quite abit of pain if I have to but prefer to know it will go away soon. So I am glad it did.

    Well, they are predicting more snow tonight.  We didn't have the ham yesterday, wouldn't thaw so we are having it today.  Today I plan another B & M cleaning day.  If you have been reading my journal you know that means Bi--H & Moan cleaning day.  Hubby is already planning his escape.  Take care all.

   Check out this site.   Some beautiful pictures.  I love nature.

 http://knuttz.net/hosted_pages/Nature-20070225

We Got Snow

              

Well we have snow up to my butt.About 7 inches so far and it is still snowing and blowing. But.....it is beautiful. I woke up and looked outside to see around 10 deer pawing through the snow looking for seed. Too dark to get a picture but what a picture it would have made. I am going to get some pictures later when it stops snowing, if it does.   Then I saw 2 dogs running in the woods, a husky and a lab, they were having so much fun playing in the snow.

               

   My son and a friend went out to eat last night against our advice. They got 2 blocks from here and hiked back. Now his friend had to spend the night as he lives 30 miles away. Why do young people always think the warnings are for everyone but them?

                

I saw the cutest care bear the other day I wanted to buy for my grandson. My husband said I couldn't get it because it had a rainbow which was for gays. What? The gays get rainbows? They already got gay, a word I used alot. It really describes my mood sometimes, now they get the rainbow also? Not fair. They can have mud pie, let me keep my rainbows. I like giving rainbows. How about fluffy clouds, they can have that, I want the damn rainbow. Who made these rules? I am getting too old to keep up. Is this stuff written someplace and why does everyone seem to know before me? Sigh 

                                                    

         I got a ham out of the freezer for supper tonight.  Seems like a good day for a big meal, comfort food.  Can't do anything else.  I am going to have to go shovel off the roof, if you don't with these deep snows you get a ice damn that can ruin your ceilings, I have 2 rooms with damage from 2 years ago.  Then I need to shovel my path.   My son and I think I'll recruit his friend will help but I don't like Rick to shovel.  Men should not shovel after 35 in my opinion especially with heart conditions.  Just asking for trouble.  Otherwise another lazy day listing items and reading in my book.  I hear this storm is wide spread.  Everyone take care.

                       

It's Snowing

        Well the predicted snow has started.  It is heavy wet snow.  The type of snow that takes down wires and tree limbs.  So what is my son doing?  Going out to eat.  Sigh.  I have been listening to you tube.  They have some great swing music.  Since our supper isn't done yet because we have been looking at all the swing tunes and dances I thought I would post these while I waited.  I love high speed Internet.  Not much going on, drinking a Goose Island India Pale Ale and chilling.  Life is good.  We should have about 7 inches of pretty new snow by the morning.  Won't last long but will be so pretty while it stays.  Take care all.

 

The storm is coming

    I miss my dragonfly that used to pose for me and I got some great shots of.  I miss green grass and warm sun on my face.  The fresh smell of my garden while I work on my flowers.  The breeze in my face as I soar down the hill on my bike.  Today....its cold freezing rain.  Predicted to turn to snow, lots of it.  They are telling us to freeze some water and get your batteries ready.  I have the making for chili and beans soups.  I have a new Carl Hiaasen book, Nature Girl to keep me occupied.  With a good book you can forget the weather outside.

   I got my MRI yesterday.  Getting the knee done is so much nicer then getting the neck done like I usually have.  No hyper ventilating from being in an enclosed place.  Still the terrible racket, but much better.  I tried to get the tech to tell me what he found, no luck.  So I said, just tell me this, should I rest my knee until I see the doctor or try to work the pain out, darn man just smiled and said, nice try!  ARRRGGGGHHH.  Darn rules. 

    In the old days I would have known because we took care of our own in the hospital.  Professional courtesy.  Doctors gave us discounts, scripts for our infections.  Lab let us know our biopsies were benign so we didn't have to wait a week in fear.  Good days.  No more though.  Now I think rules are important but we have gone to the extreme sometimes.  I don't want to wait a week to find out, WAAAAAAAAA.

   OK enough moaning and groaning.   I haven't been talking about my diet lately.  Still struggling along.  Right now I am concentrating on getting my cholesterol down along with losing some weight.  I read that Fiber One was the absolute highest in fiber to keep you full longer.  So that was my breakfast.  On top was 1/2 tsp of cinnamon to boost my metabolism and some walnuts to reduce my cholesterol.  The cinnamon will also help you lower your cholesterol. 

   The power program people sent the lab results to my doctor by the way, who promptly called me and wanted me to come in so she could put me on a med to lower my cholesterol.  I politely declined and explained I wanted to try and lower it myself first.  I think it is probably better then it was and then I told her about my doctorless year I was attempting.  She laughed!  She is going to have a baby soon though and I want to see how cute she looks so when Rick goes in I am tagging along.  Unfortunately he hasn't been able to be doctorless.  Of course I am seeing my work comp doc but that doesn't count.  I am not paying for a doctor this year if I can help it.

   The knee is sore but the swelling is down.  I wore my brace last night which helps get the swelling down.  Since I wasn't able to take my fluid pills while I did my light duty job I am making up for it today with some extra lasix.  The first day I did the job I took my fluid pill.  The washroom is about a block away.  Doesn't seem far but when you take a fluid pill and it starts to work you had better get there fast.  So I would go, then return to my desk, by the time I got back I would have to go again.  Back and forth, back and forth.  I know the women at the main desk were wondering what the heck I was up too.  So I didn't take it the rest of the week. Now I look like a balloon.  I can't get my rings off and the pillow wrinkles in my face are sticking around all day.  Very attractive.  I need to get back to my routine.  I figure I am up at least 5 pounds in fluid.  So that will be my day.  List things for the store and become very familiar with my washroom.  But I should be breathing better and feeling better by tomorrow.

  Well, off I go.  I have one package to mail before I take my lasix.  Since they messed up on my check and it was the same amount I usually make in a day I am hoping sales in the shop are good as it will be a long two weeks until I am paid again.  Bye all.

This is for all my Southern Friends.

  I got this in an email and thought it was a hoot.  So here it is.

 

 

                              Southern Talk

Someone once noted that a Southerner can get away with the most awful kind of insult just as long as it's prefaced with the words, "Bless her heart" or "Bless his heart." As in, "Bless his heart, if they put his brain on the head of a pin, it'd roll around like a BB on a 6-lane highway."

I was thinking about this the other day when a friend was telling about her new transplanted northern friend who was upset because her toddler is just beginning to talk and he has a Southern accent. My friend, who is very kind and, bless her heart, cannot do a thing about those thighs of hers, was justifiably miffed about this. After all, this woman had CHOSEN to move to South a couple of years ago.  "Can you believe it?" said her friend, "A child of mine is going to be "taaaallllkkin liiiike thiiiissss."

Now, don't get me wrong. Some of my dearest friends are from the North, bless their hearts. I welcome their perspective, their friendships, and their recipes for authentic Northern Italian food. I've even gotten past their endless complaints that you can't find good bread down here.  And the heathens, bless their hearts, don't like cornbread!

I have a friend from Bawston, bless her heart, who thinks it's hilarious when I say I've got to "carry" my daughter to the doctor or "cut off" the light. She also gets a giggle every time I am "fixin" to do something. And, bless their hearts, they don't even know where "over yonder" is, or what "I reckon" means!

My personal favorite was my aunt, saying, "Bless her heart, she cain't help being ugly, but she could'uh stayed home."

Southern girls know bad manners when they see them:
1. Drinking straight out of a can.
2. Not sending thank you notes.
3. Velvet after February.
4. White shoes before Memorial Day or after Labor Day.

Southern girls always say:
1. "Yes Maam."
2. "Yessir."

Southern girls have a distinct way with fond expressions:
1. "Yawl come back."
2. "Well, bless yer harrt."
3. "Drop by when ya can."
4. "How's yer mama?"
5. "Love yer hair."

Southern girls know their three R's:
1. Rich
2. Richer
3. Richest (Can I get an Amen?!)

Southern girls know everybody's first name:
1. Hunny
2. Darlin'
3. Schuga

Southern girls know the movies that speak to their hearts:
1. "Gone With the Wind"
2. " Fried Green Tomatoes"
3. "Driving Miss Daisy"
4. "Steel Magnolias"

Southern girls know the three deadly sins:
1. Bad hair
2. Bad manners
3. Bad blind dates

G.R.I.T.S. = Girls Raised in The South !

Now you run along, Shuger, and send this to ANY females aspiring to be GRITS--Even the northern ones, "Bless Their Hearts".

 

MRI

  I just got a call that my MRI will be tonight at 6 pm.  Weird time but whatever.  The bad thing is I won't get to know until Wed. doctor appointment what it says.  In the old days I could have found out at work. It is my record after all.  Now you have to wait.  The darn thing was throbbing and burning all night.  So to take my mind off it today I finished my tournament questions.  Boy some tough ones this time so far.  Where does that young man come up with these?

  I am getting ready to go to the post office.  Liz your package is on the way, and the library as I book I ordered came in.  Then need to get groceries.  They are really predicting some terrible weather so need to stock up just in case.  If your prepared it won't come in my experience, LOL.  After that I will spend the day listing some more things for the shop.  Things have been going well considering I just opened.  I have about 200 more things to list but will do it slowly.  Who knows when I will be working again so I had better do it while I can.

   Here is another funny someone emailed me. I am off the weekend for sure so hope to catch up on my alerts.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

  

Amore

What is Amore?
When the moon hits your eye,
Like a big pizza pie,
That's amore.
When an eel bites your hand,
And that's not what you planned,
That's a moray.
When our habits are strange,
And our customs deranged,
That's our morés.
When your horse munches straw,
And the bales total four,
That's some more hay.
When Othello's poor wife,
Becomes stabbed with a knife,
That's a Moor, eh?
When your sheep go to graze,
In a damp marshy place,
That's a moor, eh?
When your boat comes home fine,
And you tie up her line,
That's a moor, eh?
When you ace your last tests,
Like you did all the rest,
That's some more "A"s!
When on Mt. Cook you see,
An aborigine,
That's a Maori.
Alley Oop's homeland has,
A space gun with pizzazz,
That's a Moo ray.
A comedian ham,
With the name Amsterdam,
That's a Morey.
When your chocolate graham,
Is with marshmallows crammed,
That s'more, eh.
When you've had quite enough,
Of this dumb rhyming stuff,
That's "No more!", eh?

 

The longest Week.

  

  I am finished for awhile.  What a long week.  I did get into the swing of things and my new temporary boss is very impressed with me.  She hopes I stay on light duty for quite awhile, LOL.  She really complimented me today and said other people have just sat there the entire time with their nose in a book.  She likes the way I greet people and help them out.  Well I am old school.  Every job is worth doing well.  I did get to talk to some really nice people and some really interesting people.  The time still dragged and I miss my real job but I can see where a people person would like this job.  Still I am happy I am off tomorrow.  I am tired of getting up early and tired of sitting on my butt all those hours.

   Went to lunch and ate in our locker room.  My knee has been swollen and stiff from inactivity.  A chair back there was broken and of course I picked it.  I sank to the floor practically and my knee just screamed in pain.  Ouch.  I almost cried.  So by the time I got to my PT today and saw the doctor is was all swollen up again and my pain was at a 6.  It is just throbbing.  Today I could use some pain pills.  So they are going to do a MRI.  We need to find out why this is taking so long to heal.  I will be tick if it is a tear and it turns out I should have had it scoped 2 weeks ago.  I will probably get it tomorrow.

   They are expecting some major bad time weather tomorrow.  Blizzard type weather.  Hope they are wrong.  It has been beautiful all week, I finally get a day off and blizzard.  What a drag.

   Well, I am going to slug in front of the TV and watch a movie and go to bed early.  These days are killing me.  I have some packages to mail out tomorrow.  That's bad about this shift, I can't get to the post office.  I will finish this up with some funnies.

_________________________________________________

This is funny and oh so true!!!!

Here are some tips to remember before your next
visit to the ER

You need to remember these are from some practicing and
former Emergency dept. RNs!

1. Don't tell me you have abdominal pain as you eat
Doritos in my triage booth.

2. If you come to the ER by ambulance, the first
thing I will ask you is how you are getting home. No, we
don't have people on staff to drive you home, and don't tell me
you don't want to "bother" one of your family
members at this hour. You had no problem bothering
911 for the back pain you've had for 3 months.

3. You don't get to pick your own IV site. This
will irritate me and I will probably miss your IV on
purpose and start your site in the place I wanted to
initially to prove a point


4. "Butterfly" is not an IV size, this word signals
me to put in a larger bore needle.

5. Nausea is not a reason to come to the ER. If
you are not in severe pain, are not vomiting or
pooping your pants in front of me, your butt goes
back to the waiting room.

6. How can you have the worst migraine of your
life, but be able to yell at me about the wait after
you just put down a magazine you were reading?

7. Don't ever say things like, "I usually get 4 mg
of Dilaudid". Requesting your med and dosage will
prompt me to squirt out half of the med before I
inject, then I lie about the dose.

8. If you are allergic to Tylenol, Toradol, and
Motrin, I have already assumed you are a drug
seeker.

9. If you came to the ER having a family doctor
appointment that same day, I will make sure you are
still in the department well past the time of your
original appointment.

10. I don't care if you are neighbors with the GI
specialist. Unless he drove you to the ER himself,
you can't be that friendly.

11. Just because, "my doctor sent me here", does
not mean you get right back to a treatment room.
This tells me you are a pain in the ass, and he's
pawning you off.

12. The louder you moan/whine, the bigger size IV needle you get.

13. Foley catheters cure pseudo-seizures. They
also cure intoxicated persons.

14. If you are on more than 2 medicines at home,
bring a list. Don't say, "you know, the little
white pill". I am not a pharmacist.

15. RN is not synonymous with waiter/waitress.

16. Don't bitch about missing breakfast when I'm on
the ninth hour of my shift and haven't peed yet.

17. What gives you the right to complain about your
sore throat for a week while I have diarrhea from
the antibiotics I've been taking for pneumonia?

18. Broken toes are not an emergency. We'll make
you feel stupid by putting a little piece of tape
down there and kicking you out.

19. I am currently inventing a trapdoor system in
triage to be triggered when you say the word "toothache".

20. Cover you mouth when you cough/belch. This is
just common courtesy. When you neglect to do this,
I am tempted to bust butt in your room, then close the door.

21. If you tell me you have fibromyalgia or chronic
fatigue syndrome, know that I'm rolling my eyes and
thinking you're a loser.

22. If you list Haldol, geodon, Xanax, and
trazadone as allergies, don't tell me you have no
psych history.

23. Never sign in with chest pain because you were
too embarrassed to write "penile sores" or "foul
smelling discharge". This will piss me off that I
bumped you ahead of other people and I'll make your
visit horrific.

24. Although you've been in the ER four times this
week, you cannot list the ER doc as your family
physician.

25. Do not talk to me while I'm trying to listen to
your lungs.

26. Don't tell me you have no money for medicine
while you have a carton of cigarettes in your purse
are playing their own PSP's.

27. Gravida 7 at age 22 means you are a slut.

Seniors

Shown below , is an actual letter that was sent to a bank by an 86 year old woman. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the New York Times.

Dear Sir:

I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month.

By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it.

I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my entire pension, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in place for only eight years.

You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30 by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank.

My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways.

I noticed that whereas I personally answer your telephone calls and letters, --- when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, faceless entity which your bank has become.

From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person.

My mortgage and loan repayments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank, by check, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate.

Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope. Please find attached an Application Contact which I require your chosen employee to complete.

I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative.

Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof.

In due course, at MY convenience, I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me.

I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service. As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
Let me level the playing field even further .

When you call me, press buttons as follows:

IMMEDIETELY AFTER DIALING, PRESS THE STAR (*) BUTTON FOR ENGLISH

#1. To make an appointment to see me
#2. To query a missing payment.
# 3. To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.
# 4. To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping.
# 5. To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.
# 6. To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home .
#7. To leave a message on my computer, a password to access my computer is required. Password will be communicated to you at a later date to that Authorized Contact mentioned earlier.
# 8. To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.
# 9. To make a general complaint or inquiry. The contact will then be put on hold, pending the atten! tion of my automated answering service.
# 10. This is a second reminder to press* for English.


While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call.


Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement.

May I wish you a happy, if ever so slightly less prosperous New Year?

Your Humble Client

(Remember: This was written by a 86 year old woman)
'YA JUST GOTTA LOVE "SENIORS" !!!!!

________________________________________________________

   I have seen this before but in case you hadn't decided to share.  I am off again to work.  Today I got about 6 hours, not quite as good as yesterday but it should work.  Take care.

   I am sitting here by the window as I type.  Right outside steps a large buck with the most impressive rank,  behind him come 3 doe.  Such a pretty site to wake up too.

Long Day

Keeping my eye on the big picture.  Rolling down this bike trail soon.  This will all be worth it.

   It went much better today with some sleep under my belt.  Started to get to know the regulars.   If it wasn't such a long day it wouldn't be bad.  Did my exercises in between visitors.  The new one they had me add kind of messed me up and caused more pain and swelling so I stopped that pronto.

  I saw something which made me think, lots of time to think doing this job I tell you.  Someone was leaving after their long shift.  She was arguing with her husband.  Apparently he hadn't done the chores she wanted him to do from what I could gather, (Did you know that was listed as number 2 in what couples fight about)?  Anyway it got me thinking about cell phones.  In the past I would have gotten home and found out my husband hadn't made supper or cleaned the house or whatever.  Being tired and maybe having had a terrible day words would have been exchanged and I would have been angry.  Safely at home.

   Now this person maybe stays on the phone fighting with her husband all the way home.  Very distracted.  Not paying as much attention to the road as she is to why she is angry at the man on the phone, I don't know, maybe it was a child, anyway sharing the roads with us. 

     Reason number 984 why I don't like cell phones to be on why your driving.  I don't like you talking why your driving.  I want to watching to see if the light is turning yellow or if that small child is running out into the street.  Is that car packing up seeing you coming?  Any of the hundreds of things your suppose to be thinking about when your behind the wheel.  No arguing, not planning to meet someone, not getting a grocery list or just shooting the breeze.  Because my life if important to me.  I don't want to die or be injured because you didn't shut the phone off. 

   So Gee, this turned into a Rant.  I should have put my WARNING signs up, LOL.

   Well, Rick almost has supper ready.  Take care.  I am behind on my alerts doing this shift but I will get to you one and all.  Take care my friends.

Day 2

   Well, I am up, showered and dressed and pretty much ready to go.  I was in bed by 9:30 last night.  And I slept!  How wonderful,  It makes such a difference in your mood.  And I hate to admit this but it is helping my knee all this rest.  Still not ready for stairs but so much better and the swelling is down.

   Yesterday was 10 hours of the same from Friday but instead of saying, Yes it IS cold, and Yes I AM freezing, it was Yes, it IS beautiful out and Yes I am enjoying the warmth.  It was in the 40's yesterday and everyone was loving it.  I saw 2 people with shorts on, not quite appropriate but after -0 for so long it felt like a real heat wave. 

   The grumpy man was back!  Oh my.  I couldn't help but ask if he had been lost in the building since last week.  He glared at me but left pretty quietly after a few barbs about how terrible the place was laided out.  I wonder if he is a test for the poor crippled souls who get stuck doing this job while they rest their strained and torn limbs? 

    Regulars know that this job is where the walking wounded get placed and most ask what body part I have hurt.  Kind of funny.  I have learned who the regulars are in the 2 days and know now to not push the elevator button when the kids come as they get really disappointed if they don't get to push the button.  How could I have forgotten that.  I also have a huge pile of medical magazines I got from my boss to keep me occupied and am doing my exercises in my chair in between visitors.  It is still the longest 10 hours but I suppose at my age I should be pleased they go by sooooooo sloooooowwwwwlllllyyy.

   The picture above was my porch this spring.  I can't wait until it looks like that again.  Now it is snow covered and the empty planters look so sad.  I can't wait to get them blooming again.

  Well, time to get my lunch ready and put on my face.  Take care all.

Yawn

  

    My clock is so messed up.  I spend the whole night thinking, if I can get to sleep now I will get 7 hours......if I can get to sleep now I can get 6 hours......if I can get to sleep now I can get 5 hours.    Finally 2 hours before I have to get up I fall asleep and then have to get up.   I am tired, tired, tired.   I need to get back to my nights.

   I have physcial therapy at 8 and then go to the hospital for my fun elevator job.  I only have to work 10 hours tonight.  Seems like a long time.  Well, time to get ready.  Have a good day all.

Weekend assignment.

   John as a cute weekend assignment for us.  Take the picture on his site and give it a caption.  Heres mine.

Hi Everyone

    The sweet williams above are one of my favorite flowers.  They bloom a long time and come in many colors plus they come up every year which I like.  Can't wait until I see them again.

   I have been very busy so far this morning.  Ended up not doing anything I had planned to do yesterday as we took my MIL grocery shopping and then went shopping ourselves.  I was pretty concerned about my MIL as she just looks pale and vague these days.  No spark.  I want her to go back to the doctors on a day I can go.  It wore her out completely just shopping.  She has me worried.  She is still stubborn though and won't even talk about moving in here or to an apartment.  Darn woman.

    So today I did a lot of listing in the store and some packing on some items I sold.  I need to take pictures the rest of the day.  I also did my groin management class.  It is a very good program in case any nurses reading this want the link.  If you work with heart caths alot it is a lot of great information and its on line.

   Rick is gone so I am enjoying a little break.  He likes to visit with me while I am trying to work listing my items to the store.  I have to watch it as I will start typing in what he says.  Now he is out walking the dog.  

   Zoey is going to be 8 years old on the 26.  I can't believe she has gotten that old already.  Yesterday we saw a brown baby lab and it looks like Zoey as a baby.  We bought her a Greenie to have on her birthday, nope, no surprise party planned here, LOL. 

   We are having a heat wave today.  It is in the 30's and things are melting.  Muddy mess when you live on gravel but I don't care, warm.  We are even going to grill a steak.  I haven't had one for along time.

   Now for my knee.  Feels better today actually.  Maybe the prolonged rest is the ticket.  Still hurts alot to go up or down stairs or squat down but it doesn't seem as swollen.  Keeping my fingers crossed.  I don't see the doc again until friday.

   I have been visiting all the journals and enjoying the flowers and pictures.  It is like passing spring along until it can actually catch up.  Keep them coming.  I can almost smell them.

   Well, break time over.  Back to listing. Can't sell the item if I don't show the item, LOL.  Hey, anyone have anything they want to sell drop me a line.  In this line of work you are always looking for inventory.

Heart Disease

                             

   I did read some interesting articles yesterday.  One was about women's heart problems.  Now I work on a heart floor and found this interesting but it is something all women should know.

   Did you know worldwide Cardiovascular Disease causes 8.6 million deaths among woman making it the number 1 killer of women!

    CVD kills nearly 12 times as many American women then Breast Cancer!

     The CVD rate has risen slightly over the last 2 decades while it has declined steadily in men.

   CVD causes 1 in every 2.6 female deaths ( compared to 1 in 30 deaths from breast cancer).

    In 2003 3 million women had CVD ( Coronary Vascular Disease)  Of these 6 million had Coronary Heart Disease ( CHD) and 3.1 million suffered stroke.

    CHD accounts for the majority of CVD deaths in women.  

    Nearly  two-thirds of women who die suddenly from CHD had no previously recognized symptoms.

    Within 6 years of a recognized heart attack, 35% of women have another MI, 11% have a stroke, and 6 % experience sudden cardiac death.

    Heart disease should be on the international women's health agenda- but its not.  Although it kills more women then all types of cancer, HIV/AIDS, malaria and TB, not a single international aid agency funds programs related to women's heart disease and stroke.

    A lot of this is lack of risk awareness.  Also women don't have the same symptoms as men.  We are misdiagnosed more often when we are having heart attacks.  The crushing chest pain going down the left arm, the shortness of breath, profuse sweating associated with men's heart attack symptoms are strangely absent in most women.  In one study only 30% of women reported any chest pain and acute chest pain was absent in 43%.  Which even today causes many doctors to not take her symptoms seriously.  So many women are dismissed home to suffer their heart attacks there.

   So what are some of the warning signs women should look out for?

   Unusual fatigue, sleep disturbances, shortness of breath, indigestion, or anxiety.  Also when did the symptoms start?  Women commonly start to experience symptoms up to a month before they have a heart attack.

    Another thing to watch out for.  If your symptoms fail to respond to treatment.  Some women are misdiagnosed with anxiety, depression, or a GI disorder.

   Are you taking a hormone replacement drug?  That may increase your risk.

   Do you have risk factors?  Diabetes mellitus, hypertension, obesity?  Diabetic women have cardiovascular death risk up to 8 times more then diabetic men.

  Another thing, woman with heart disease seem to be treated with less aggression then men.  Why is that?  Most studies done on heart disease are on men's heart disease.  We are twice as likely to die from our heart disease then men, TWICE.

   OK so what should you do?

   Get a checkup

   Start moving, walk jog or march 30 minutes a day, rain or shine.

   Quit smoking.

  Lose a pound or two.

   Cut out the salt.

   And last but not least know the symptoms.  Be aggressive in getting the care you need,  make sure they completely rule out heart disease as a problem before they diagnose you with something else. 

    I have had women who's only symptom was a sore elbow.  One lady felt dizzy every time she stood, another lady just didn't have her usual pep.  It was harder for her to do her regular chores.  She had been dismissed as getting older.  Be assertive.  And be good to your heart,.

   So that is my lecture for today.  It is the month that we have designated as Women's heart awareness month.  Be good to your heart and it will be good to you.

  Most of the facts were gotten from American Nurse Today.  They had an excellent article that was begging to be shared.  Because you know what?  I see alot of women and they are usually seen after their heart attacks.  Lets make that before, lets get them treated before the damage.  We are changing it around at our hospital, make sure yours does the same.  Women are not equal when it comes to this.

                

The longest Day

    Torture,

        Take a night worker who is used to running around.  Old enough that sitting for long stretches really makes her stiff and sore.   Sit said night worker in front of a cold outside  door that opens every couple of seconds and make her sit there for 8 hours greeting people and pushing the elevator button.  Then take said night worker and have her do chart audits for a additional 4 hours and you have one extremely mentally tired and stiff and sore old nurse.  

     I think I must have agreed with 400 people that , Yes, it is really cold out there, and Yes it is really cold and drafty in front of this door, and Yes, this was a pretty boring job, and Yes, I was still here.  I spent a hour after I got home trying to get the frozen smile off my face.  If I hadn't been so tired I would have loved a hot bath as I was chilled to the bone.  I have nothing but admiration for the volunteers who usually do that job, without pay! 

   I also got yelled at for 5 minutes by a man who couldn't find our payroll dept because I built this stupid !)#%%@#)@ building so #)(*#@* that there were probably people wandering around here that had been lost for decades.  I sweetly smiled and personally led him to our business office so he could pay his bill and told him when he came back to the desk I would help him find his car.   He never returned.  Just another lost soul wandering the halls of my hospital, LOL.

    Now today I am suppose to do a learning program called groin management.  My husband is getting a real kick out that I tell you and has offered frequently to be a live subject for me.  Ha Ha.  Jokingly he asked if we are going back to doing private duty nursing, snicker snicker.  Rolling my eyes, How many times has I heard THAT!   My co-workers where laughing and offering to trade places with me all day.  Just sit them there for 12 hours and see if they are still singing that song. 

    The good news?   Well I did get to work and make some money, that is the only good news.  The bad news?  I get to do it Monday through Thursday for 10 hours each day.  Since my knee is still so painful I don't foresee any miracle happening soon like it suddenly healing itself.  The bad thing about this.  I am suppose to do my exercises 3 times a day.  I will be lucky to get in 2 times but probably just once a day.  I could never do a desk job, well maybe I could if I had something more stimulating to do.

   I am off now until Monday.  I go to PT on Monday and then after that I go to the hospital for my new job, official greeting, elevator button pusher and let me tell you how to get to that floor.  I do like talking to people so that part wasn't so bad.  If I had slept more then 4 hours it would have been better.  If it hadn't been soooooo cold it would have been much nicer also.  Rest my knee and die of pneumonia. 

   Since I am now off the weekend I plan on getting alot of stuff listed and put in my shop.  I am having big computer problems also.  For some reason it says I have filled up my memory.  I having added anything and have very few pictures on the computer as I use photo bucket to store my pictures.  I have tried everything and even deleted programs I don't use often so try and free us more space.  I have run a spy bot to see if I have a bunch of ad ware and a virus scan.  Nothing major there.  Deleted programs I don't use often.  Still only gave me 6 %.  So I am not sure what is going on there.  I had 36% 3 days ago.  Darn computers.  It seems like since we hooked up to cable it has started so maybe that has something to do with it.  This would be a bad time to have my computer go down.

   I also am way behind on alerts.  I was too tired yesterday to read any so today I do.  Rick is making me oatmeal and then I am going to visit everyone,  take a ton of pictures and start listing, listing, listing.  I have some offers on a couple of items in the shop so have to consider if I want to sell them at that price.  Exercise my knee, do laundry, vacuum, stay warm, that is my day.  Hope everyone is having a great weekend.

This should be interesting

    It's early in the morning.  I slept terrible.  This is why I don't work days.  I spend all night worrying about not waking up on time.  What in the world will I do for 12 hours.  I am suppose to sit in a desk by the elevators for 12 hours and tell people how to get around in the hospital.  I can only read professional magazines.  At night, after 6 hardly anyone uses the main lobby.  I will probably be down there by myself trying to stay awake.  They torture you like this so you recover quicker.  I tell you I would love to recover quicker.  This is work comp for you.  They create a job rather then have you stay home and rest.  WHY ME.  I had to go through work comp when I broke my back.  They treat you like your lying.  I think they train you in that.  I was so glad when my neck ruptured I was 400 miles away from the hospital.  I was able to recover without the pressure of coming to work.  No one treated my like a liar.  I got the treatment I needed.

  So on the other hand I am glad they are letting me work.  Just wish it wasn't going to be so boring.  I could maybe do it for 8 hours but after 3 it is going to be so difficult to keep busy.  And what about tomorrow and the next day?  I am suppose to work all weekend.  This is driving me nuts.  Wish me luck.  I am not good at just sitting around.

Well What a Day

  I started out my day by going to physical therapy this morning and then seeing the doctor.  My knee was more then a little sore from my short hike yesterday at the falls.  But slowly I think it is getting better.  It isn't popping quite as loud but walking up and down stairs is still painful and getting down on my knees wouldn't be something I would do willingly.  Anyway the Doctor increased my restriction from 1 to 2 hours standing to 2 to 4 with no squatting or getting on my knees, no danger there, LOL.  Problem is when I called my boss to let her know it turns out they won't let me work with these restrictions.  I was afraid of that.  They are going to work me but not doing any nursing.  I am going to sit in front of a elevator and direct people to where they are going......for 12.5 hours!  Can you say looooooooonnnnnnngggggggg boring day! I start at 8:15 in the morning, gee, I haven't done days in years.  No shift di this way.  I told my boss I would do telemetry, work more days only 8 hours, do chart edits what ever it took so I could get some hours in while I let my knee heal.  Please please PLEASE let it heal soon. 

    My therapist still thinks it is a tear and she thinks I should get a MRI, the doctor thinks it is the patela and thinks it just needs to rest and keep doing my exercises.  I think it is costing me a fortune is missed hours and I should have kept my mouth shut and just dealt with the pain.  So I am not going to work tonight after all.  Whaaaaa. 

   So of course I did not buy the shelf.  Even as low as they went I am not spending any money that way right now.  I should be saving it for my furnace anyway.  Sigh. 

    I have been spending the last 2 hours listing items in my shop.  I figure at this rate by next month I will have everything listed.  That is the bad thing about selling on line.  Thanks to Elizabeth for my first sell, Yippy.  Now to find a partner. 

    My camera is messing up again.  It says I have no pictures on it but if I hook it up there are 4 pictures showing up.  I don't seem to be able to erase them.  It did this before but I finally got rid of them so will have to get the manual out again and remind myself how I did it.   Memory like a steel trap here.  So that's my day.  Now for my rant of the day.  Can't get by without one.

   WARNING WARNING WARNING, RANT AHEAD

   I have been hearing so much in the news lately about how the USA is trying to get Iran and Iraq in a war.  What!  Have we forgotten they came here and attacked US, not once but twice they bombed the Trade Center.  Have we forgotten 9-11?  Does anyone really think if we back off and stop now they will stop coming over here and attacking us?  Or any of the other countries they have been attacking and blowing up?  And these weren't soldiers they murdered here.  These were civilians, mothers, children, fathers.  Innocent people just going to work and doing their job.  I personally don't think they will stop until all that don't believe as they do are dead.  It makes me so mad.   They ATTACKED US, THEY ATTACKED US, THEY ATTACKED US.   Is this going to be like the Holocaust?  People are now saying that never happened?  Are we going to forget this also?

 

   Like the artist who made the picture below I will never forget it, never.

Contributed by: Leonardo Oosthuizen

   So on this rant and rave I will close so I can make supper and then get back to listing everything.  I really do want to say Peace on Earth and Goodwill toward Man.  Please dear God.

 

We had such a fun, cold day.

     We ended up going to Sioux Falls after all.  Rick got back from the doctors late and we got his new blood pressure med filled.  Then off we went.  It was so cold out.  We stopped in Tea at the Antique store but I didn't see anything I could afford although I did see some things I liked.  Then we went to the falls.  I got some pictures and a couple I really liked but most were just OK.  It was so bitterly cold.  My fingers were froze by the time we got back to the car.  Check out my pictures in my other album.

 

      After the pictures we went out to eat and then drove home.  Rick got me my favorite color rose.  Isn't it lovely.

    I got the approval to open my store.  So far I only have 10 things in it and it is so late don't think I will add anymore tonight.  It takes a long time to get them all in.  Anyway check it out.  I decided to go with the logo I was practicing with as it is so small it doesn't matter that you can't see much.

http://www.rubylane.com/shops/megamom134

For My Hubby

   

Happy Valentines Day

                                                                

    Happy Valentines Day J-land.   Hope you are spending it with the ones you love.

   We were going to go to Sioux Falls today.  I wanted to get pictures of the falls in the winter with the ice and snow.  However........ it was -13 when we got up.  It is now -3 but we are having 2nd thoughts about traveling 60 miles in this weather.  Break down and your in real trouble.  I always dress for the weather and carry blankets in the car plus I have my trac phone but you never know.  I think I will leave it up to Rick.

   Rick is at his hearts doctors this morning.  He is seeing about getting his med increased plus his blood pressure is getting high.  Not surprising as he is a doom and gloom lover of all the news that is bad to hear.  I hear him sometimes yelling at the radio, LOL.  I have a basement full of water he is saving and canned goods for when the bad times come.  No wonder his blood pressure is high.  Not that I keep my head in the sand.  I know bad times are coming, I am ready to be prepared.... but I don't want to think about it all the time.

     I went for my physical therapy yesterday.  I was trying to pin them down on how long they think this will take to heal.  Don't like the fact that they keep saying...... well sometimes it take quite awhile.... Ok, how long is quite awhile, days, weeks, months!  I have to go to work tomorrow.  He has me back on a 1 to 2 hour standing restriction.  Hello...... I work 12.5 hour shifts.  They say if your willing to be patient and let your knee heal you can sometimes avoid surgery.   Believe me I want to be patient but I do not want to be fired.  I don't have to time or money to be patient.  I also am trying to find out what will happen if I just do nothing.  By that I mean just go to work and live with the pain.  I am pretty good at doing that with all my bone problems.  That doesn't sound like something they want to talk about either.  They did mention that is how people end up with needed total knee repairs done.  Tomorrow I see the doctor so we will see what he says.

    We went flea market shopping yesterday.  I found the neatest display case with heavy glass shelves that would be perfect in my kitchen to show off my pottery.  The color isn't right for my kitchen but I could easily stain it to match my cupboards.   I offered them $50.00 less then they are asking and will find out today if they accept it.  Keep your fingers crossed.  This thing cost $500.00 new.  I want it for way less.  Way less.  It has been there for awhile so I would think they would be anxious to get rid of it.  It has the prettiest lace curtain in the back.  Getting it home will be a trick but if we take out a seat or 2 in the van it should work.

   Today is my granddaughters birthday.  She is 6.  We sent her a life size stuffed dog that looks like Zoey.  She misses Zoey.  She called this morning and just loves it and named it Chloe.  They are having tons of snow and ice where she lives so she gets to stay home and play all day.  I am so glad she likes the dog as I was not to sure about it but Rick picked it out and I hated to say anything.  It was an expensive pain in the you know what to ship I tell you.

             

           I still haven't heard if I get to open my shop.  Sheesh, how long could it take to look at 10 items and decide.  Now I am nervous since I quit them and went to a different site they won't let me come back.  It was strictly a financial decision.  Now  I will be starting my 6 day stretch, if they let me work, and won't have the time to add my items.  I might be scarce around here for awhile.

         Well, that is all the news, fit or not that I have.  So far nothing has triggered a rage.  We might end up doing our usually tradition tonight but I bet we don't see many couples out holding hands in this weather.   Have a wonderful day all.

                    

    

Thamnophissirtalis

Subject:  Thamnophissirtalis

Garden Grass Snakes also known as Garter Snakes
(Thamnophissirtalis) can be dangerous.  Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes.  Here's why.
A couple in Sweetwater , Texas , had a lot of
potted plants.  During  a recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze.
It turned out that a little green garden grass
snake was hidden in one of the plants and when it had warmed up, it slithered out and  the wife saw it go under the sofa.
She let out a very loud scream.
The husband (who was taking a shower) ran out into the living room naked to see what the problem was.  She told him there was a snake under the sofa.
He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it.  About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him on the  behind.  He thought the snake had bitten him, so he screamed and  fell over on the floor.
His wife thought he had had a heart attack, so she covered him up, told him to lie still and called an ambulance.
The attendants rushed in, wouldn't listen to his protests and  loaded him on the stretcher and started carrying him out.
About that time the snake came out from under the sofa and the Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the
stretcher. That's when the man broke his leg and why he is still in  the hospital.
The wife still had the problem of the snake in the house, so she called on a neighbor who volunteered to capture the snake.  He armed himself with a rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the couch.  Soon he decided it was gone and told the woman, who sat down on the sofa in relief.
But while relaxing, her hand dangled in between the cushions, where  she felt the snake wriggling around.  She screamed and fainted , the  snake rushed back under the sofa.

The neighbor man, seeing her lying there passed out, tried to use CPR to revive her.

The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the grocery store, saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and slammed her husband in the back of the head with a bag of canned goods, knocking him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it needed stitches.

The noise woke the woman from her dead faint and she saw her neighbor lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed that he had been bitten by the snake.  She went to the kitchen and got a small bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.

By now the police had arrived.

They saw the unconscious man, smelled the whiskey, and assumed that  a drunken fight had occurred.  They were about to arrest them all,  when the women tried to explain how it all happened over a little  green snake.
The police called an ambulance, which took away the neighbor and his sobbing wife.

Now, the little snake again crawled out from under the sofa and one  of the policemen drew his gun and fired at it.  He missed the snake  and hit the leg of the end table.  The table fell over, the lamp on  it shattered and, as the bulb broke, it started a fire in the drapes.

The other policeman tried to beat out the flames, and fell through  the window into the yard on top of the family dog who, startled, jumped out and raced into the street, where an oncoming car swerved  to avoid it and smashed into the parked police car.

Meanwhile, the burning drapes, were seen by neighbors who called in the fire department.  The firemen had started raising the fire ladder when they were halfway down the street.  The rising ladder tore out the overhead wires and put out the power and disconnected the telephones in a ten-square city block are a (but they did get the house fire out).

Time passed!  Both men were discharged from the hospital, the house  was repaired, the dog came home, the police acquired a new car and  all was right with their world.

A while later they were watching TV and the weatherman announced a cold snap for that night.  The wife asked her husband if he thought  they should bring in their plants for the night.

And that's when he shot her.

Music Rant

                       Another Rant and Rave.

    Heard about the Grammy awards.  I am not going to mention the "artist" who did the song.  He was hailed a genius.  The song talks about how he was going to kill his boss today.

   I am 52 years old.  I can look back in certain times of my life and remember the music that was playing at that time.  My first job...."A horse with no name",  Meeting my husband...... "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face",  My children's childhood, "We don't Need No education, We don't need no thought control".  

    Tragic times in my life, I was abducted and raped when I was 18..... when I hear "Angie" I still want to crawl under the table and hide my head. 

    Music is important and it does influence you weather you want to believe it or not.  Every period of my life I have a song to tag it with.  That is why I think this type of music is harmful.  Not funny, not genius, not good......dangerous.   When I have music stuck in my head I don't want it to be I want to kill my Boss. 

    I am strong enough to ignore that, but some aren't.  Because of that you are responsible for what you write, what you put to some catchy lyrics.  You are responsible for any damage that is done.  Because seriously..... don't you agree....What song were you listening too the time your husband asked you to marry him.  What were you listening too when your parents died.  What were you listening to on 9-11?  You can't tell me it doesn't affect you. 

   Once again these are my opinions, my believes I have arrived at during my short 52 years of life.  I don't think we should be talking censoring, we should be talking moral responsibility.